Vista is Vistarded

Look at this delightful image:


I hate you Windows Vista. Even if you were the cutest kitten in the world, I would hold you under the water until you went limp. Then I would revive you and set you on fire. Then I would start a blog about how much you suck.

I'll have to be content with the blog for now.

Vista sucks,
Randy

My favorite thing about Vista.

It's sad that my favorite thing about Vista -- favorite thing to hate, that is -- is impossible to grab in a true screenshot. When a security issue arises, you don't just get a pop-up or alert box, no no. THE WHOLE SCREEN GOES BLACK for a second. It looks something like this:

I had to create this image myself, though, because my screenshot grabber won't work when Vista is giving me a security alert of this type. In fact, NOTHING will work until you resolve this security issue. It does give you a pop-up about whatever the issue is, after a moment, but that is ALL YOU CAN DO. You can cancel or accept the action.

"Can I just check online really fast to see if this progra--"
"NEIN! Anzwer ze question! Or ve vill SHOOT ZIS PUPPY!"

Vista sucks,
Randy

Last time I'll harp on this, honest

JUST DELETE THE FILES!


Keep in mind -- it was taking long enough to a) make me notice, b) start to bother me, and c) let me run my screenshot grabber to capture the event for posterity.

Vista sucks,
Randy

Hello? Windows Explorer? You okay?

So, yeah. I click to open a file, and Vista says "Whu? Huh? What time is it? You wanna what? Look in the folder? 'kay, 'kay, gimme a sec."


Those conspicuous empty spaces are where Vista just drew a blank, I guess. Poor girl. She was probably up late downloading security updates.

Vista sucks,
Randy

What's wrong with this picture, part 2

I'm copying 25 items -- a total of 60.3 KB -- and it says it's gonna take about 5 minutes.



"Hey, Mr. Car, thanks for the mileage estimate on this upcoming left turn. How long do you think this turn should take?"
"Thaaaaaat looks like about a 10-minute turn there."
"Really?? Why so long?"
"Listen. You can turn, or you can turn RIGHT. Which is it gonna be?"
"You mean right like correct, or right like the direction? Because I wanna go left--"
"All right, wise guy, you just added 3 minutes to your turn."
"....is it too late for me to go back to riding a bike?"
"You don't want a bike. They're not compatible with any of the major fuel types."

What's wrong with this picture?

Consider the following:


I'm moving one (1) item.

It took probably 10 seconds. First it had to "calculate time remaining" -- which of course took more time than the actual operation itself.

Imagine it happening while you're driving:

"Okay, car, I'm gonna make a left turn here."
"A'right, one sec -- lemme calculate the gas mileage for this turn."
"I don't need the mileage -- I need to turn. Right now. Why won't the wheel move? I'm missing my turn!"
"Hold on, hold on, I almost have it."
"Nevermind. I missed my turn."
"Well, the application of the brakes and the subsequent acceleration was gonna cost you an extra .08 cents, so it's probably for the best."

Vista sucks,
Randy

Um, I don't have WHAT?

I should preface this by saying my user account is that of an administrator. I'm the boss, right?

NOT ACCORDING TO VISTA, I'M NOT.

Imagine you're a homeowner. You're looking for the masking tape, and you can't find it. In your searching, you stumble across a drawer, and lo and behold, it's LOCKED.



Oh. Wait. I can click CONTINUE and get into that secret drawer. Not sure how this is called "security", but okay. I click continue, and it asks me if I want to be able access this folder.

"Um. Yes. Yes I do."

"Okay, sir, you know have access to this folder."

This, as you can guess, was very frustrating. Why would I lock MYSELF out of ANYTHING? Isn't the whole point of different user accounts to have all these locks built in by user status? I'm an Admin, I get the skeleton key.

Oh, crap. Where did I put it? ...hope it's not in this drawer...

Vista sucks,
Randy